Totally Unauthorized

A side of the film industry most people never see.

Craft Service Envy and Chair Thefts

We had an hour “Pre Call” today, which means that we came in an hour before everyone else did, so that we could do some prep work (moving our carts, pre lighting, etc..) before the rest of the crew came in.

The good thing about being there that early is that you get the good stuff off the craft service table before the rest of the crew has the chance to pick over it like vultures. No one eats before they come in, because there’s stuff at the stage, so everyone is very, very hungry by the time the food hits the table – usually right at call, so you have to stash your plate somewhere while you work for an hour..

Our ‘crafty’ guy doesn’t put much out, so folks actually run to the table when he’s got something new. He had nectarines this morning, and we took about four of them and put them in one of our carts to ripen. Good call, too.. they were gone in ten minutes. In a few days, when they’re ripe, I’ll eat one in the middle of set and watch the stampede to the crafty table because folks will think he’s put more out! Heh.

There is also an epidemic of chair stealing.. On a set, you stand for 12+ hours a day, and those places to sit (chairs, apple boxes, stools, boxes, furniture when the set dressers aren’t looking) are prime real estate. The second you get up – the seat’s gone. Usually. On “Enterprise”, someone is just taking them (the set pieces, I understand.. they have to go back to the furniture rental place, and the apple boxes get cleaned up by the grips, but we had a few camp chairs marked for our department scattered about and now they’re all gone).. When you’re strung out and crazed from working these hours, this is a BIG DEAL. My boss threw a fit over it, and an APB was put out for the chairs.. we got a couple of them back, but I have no idea where the others are.. probably on another stage somewhere.

Connor – one of the actors – was doing a very heavy scene were he’s badly injured and is put into a tube thingy.. there’s all this drama, they shove him into the tube and as the scene draws to a close, we all hear this “OW!” – turns out the effects guys had pulled him into the chamber too quickly, and he whacked his head on the back wall..

My boss has become a snarling hypercritical maniac.. I was warned that this would happen.. Apparently he’s only nice to new employees for a week and a half to two weeks, and then he becomes a raving jackass. If he keeps this up, I’m off the show. Life is too short to tolerate that shit. I’ve nicknamed him “The Walrus” as he’s sort of bristling and bellowing all the time.. Now all the boys are doing impressions of him bellowing. It’s hilarious.. I think that’s another nickname that’s going to stick.

Jolene’s (another of the actors) dog – a very, very cute King Charles Spaniel whom I just love – kept barking during takes – this set off the dog who plays “Porthos”, and then she started barking. Havoc. The DP started screaming, the AD’s started screaming, and then the dogs barked more.. The more the dogs barked, the more the DP yelled, and the more the crew laughed at the silliness of it all.

Call time: 6 am.
Wrap time: 10 pm.

Filed under: Work

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