Totally Unauthorized

A side of the film industry most people never see.

Attack of the Teenagers

For the rest of the show, we’re going to be shooting in a high school in the San Fernando Valley. Although the school goes on Christmas break next week, for the next two days it’s full of students.

I’ve managed to spend most of my adult life avoiding teenagers. Even the ‘teenage’ extras in our movie are actually in their 20’s due to restrictions about working minors long hours.

These actual teenagers would stick their heads into the room that we had our equipment or into the set (us, grip, camera, sound, wardrobe, beauty* and video village** all in a medium sized classroom) and demanding to be put in the movie, be given something off the craft service table or to meet one of the actors:

Teenager 1: “Ohmygod, I HAVE to be in your movie. Put me in your movie!”

Teenager 2: “That actor is so superhot – you have to put me in the movie now! Ohmygod!”

Teenager 3: “Give me some of that food! What do you mean you don’t have enough?”

Teenager 4: “Ohmygod, that actor is so totally superhot! Ohmygod – what’s he like?”

Teenager 5: “Hey, put me in the movie! Hey! HEY!! Why are you ignoring me?”

Me: “Look, I’m just an electrician. The biggest favor I can do for you is to tape down all my cables so that you don’t trip and fall on your ass in front of that so totally superhot actor (who, for the record, is cute in that non-threatening boy kind of way, but I’d hesitate to call him ‘superhot’. Maybe I’m just old).”

Teenager 5: “Ohmygod! I so totally need to be whatever you are so I can get put in the movie.”

Me: “Fine, call me when you get your union card and I’ll give your number to my boss.”

Teenager 5: “BITCH!!!”

If I’d ever wanted kids, today would have killed that desire. Like totally. At least they were all gone by about 4 pm.

Today was only 12 hours, due to the producer cracking the whip, and we finished everything on the call sheet, which is a good thing – no added work tomorrow.

*Beauty, sometimes called “Primp and Crimp” is the hair and makeup departments.

**Video Village is the monitor where the director, producers et al. sit and watch what’s being shot. It’s always in our way.

Filed under: Work

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