Totally Unauthorized

A side of the film industry most people never see.

My new BFF

Happily, I’m walking almost normally now. I don’t need the crutches or a cane any longer, altough I’m still a long way from being graceful (although one could argue that I was far from graceful before the surgery).

The foot has improved so much that I’m able to do lots of cardio in the gym (not on the treadmill, though – mostly the elliptical since it doesn’t hurt the foot) in an effort to lose the post-surgery bulge before I have to go back to work.  I can ride my bicycle, but not for very long – about half an hour and the foot’s had it.

I’m still really worn out in the evenings so the semi-hiatus will continue for a bit longer (and I’d like to thank the three of you who are still bothering with me), but things are definitely looking up.  Hopefully I’ll be able to go back to work very soon and take advantage of the sudden surge in production.

In other news, since I’ve never before posted a bunch of pictures of my foot on the internet, I was unprepared for the consequences.

Creepy Internet Foot Fetish Yokel (CIFFY) has taken to sending me angry emails on a daily basis expressing his anger about my posting my decidedly unsexy foot photos on the internet, where, apparently, they have sullied his precious retinae.

CIFFY is outraged – outraged – that there’s a woman somewhere in the world who hasn’t bothered with a manicure (in ‘hore red’, no less), and yet has the unmitigated gall to post such pictures on his internet.

How dare I forget that all photos of any woman’s feet anywhere are for the sole purpose of making CIFFY want to touch himself like the parish priest used to do before Mom found out.

CIFFY’s misspelled rants have called into question my physical appearance, my ancestry, my ‘moarel fibar’, etc… Each email becomes progressively more insulting as I fail to react in a manner that CIFFY deems appropriate.

I’ve had to block CIFFY from commenting on my Flickr photos and here, but he’s still sending me emails using proxy servers (I guess when you sit at home all day on the computer, some actual knowledge manages to seep in).

So, CIFFY, this one’s for you:


Filed under: Uncategorized

11 Responses

  1. Charli says:

    This looks like the movie “Alien” but instead of being inside your chest, the alien is in your foot. And for the idiot who has complained about the pics of your foot, I do remember your faithful, loyal fans ASKED for pictures.

    We can’t help it. We loved Hollyweird!

  2. k4kafka says:

    We asked…you posted :)

  3. Annika says:

    Just remember, for every CIFFY there are probably three guys who think injured feet are hot and are smart enough to keep that opinion to themselves.

    …that started out as a comforting thought, but something was lost in the translation.

  4. Daisy says:

    Ooh. Your foot looks so much better. (also more sexy without the stiches and everything) ;-)

  5. Stan says:

    Heh. Are you sure that CIFFY isn’t actually a LOLcat pretending to be human?

    Peggy sez: Oh, my God. That explains so much.

  6. geekhiker says:

    As I recall, we all said “post some pictures”, you said “uh, okay, but it looks horrible” and we all said “nah, it doesn’t look that bad!” Looks pretty darn good in that pic too (of course, I’m an outdoorsy guy, so I tend to think scars are cool). Ugh, I guess there’s always a critic in every room.

    The internet: making the world a smaller, crazier place since… well, whenever Al Gore invented it!

    • Chris says:

      Just returned from Costco with NSAID’s for my swollen, hairy, poorly pedicured, decidedly male gout-ridden foot.

      I’d happily send him a picture to burn his eyes from his head and render him incapable of further postings.

  7. ironrailsironweights says:

    Dunno, I’ve never quite gotten the point of foot fetishes ….


  8. meg says:

    mmmm, “moaral fibar.” sounds tasty (hee hee)

  9. Matthew says:

    One of my friends got a lot of mail (like, physical mail) from one of those guys, including the creepy stop motion animation done with lego that he’d done with some friends. It involved a lot of lego buttsex.

    It’s been a while since I stopped in here, so I was unaware of your operation at all. Hope your foot makes a fine recovery despite its callous lack of toenail polish.

  10. meg says:

    Yay! You must be feeling better-the Abandoned Couches have returned.

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