Totally Unauthorized

A side of the film industry most people never see.

Post Thanksgiving pantry issues

This Thanksgiving was a potluck affair, which is good and bad at the same time.

Good because one person doesn’t have to do all the cooking, but bad because there’s not really a cohesive menu plan in place. People just get assigned to bring something or other and, well, it can be interesting.

Luckily, everything was fantastic and a good time was had by all – especially after we were a half-dozen bottles of wine into the evening.

My contribution was a stuffing containing hazelnuts.

Which turned out pretty well, except that now I’ve got about half a pound of hazelnuts in my pantry and while they tasted great in said stuffing, on their own they’re absolutely horrible.

It’s like there’s a party in my mouth and someone just threw up all over the sofa. Which is odd, since I normally like hazelnut flavored things. Guess it’s not the same as actual hazelnuts.

Since I’m loathe to discard even semi-edible food, I’m just about at my wit’s end trying to figure out what to do with these damn things.

Ground up over ice cream? Disgusting.

Toasted in butter? Disgusting, and a waste of good butter.

Soaked in chocolate? Still disgusting.

I know I’m in trouble if something that’s covered in chocolate tastes nasty.

Short of throwing the fucking things at the seagulls, I’m out of ideas.

Anyone have any suggestions?


NOTE: Not chestnuts. Chestnuts are little packages of awesome. I’m referring to Hazelnuts, also known as Filberts, also known as “dear gods what the fuck did I just put in my mouth?”


Filed under: Non-Work, Off-Topic

8 Responses

  1. Annika says:

    Perhaps you could find a homeless person who likes hazelnuts? Of course, it would probably end up like the time in college that I ordered from the crappy pizza place and it was so bad I couldn’t eat it, but NO ONE ELSE WOULD TAKE IT.

  2. Susan says:

    (I’ve been reading your blog for a while but never commented.) You said that you don’t like chocolate covered hazelnuts, but do you like nutella? If so, you could make your own. You probably need a blender or food processor, though. or There are simpler recipes out there, too, I’m sure.

  3. Carly says:

    I’ll happily take those hazelnuts off your hands. I love ’em.

  4. ironrailsironweights says:

    If it weren’t for hazelnuts we wouldn’t have Frangelico.


  5. Marci Liroff says:

    This is THE MOST amazing salad with roasted and ground hazelnuts sprinkled over the top. Even if you don’t use the hazelnuts…you’ll love this recipe!

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